Friday, May 20, 2011

Mother's Day Mouth Massacre

Do you like the over the top usage of alliteration? It was the Wifey's idea for a title, so I figured I would give her the necessary props.

As the family was getting ready for Mother's Day last week, we were all doing our thing in the bedroom: the Wifey was doing her hair, I was scrambling to put up a Mother's Day blog post, and the Baby was being hyper and running around the room. The Baby does a great job of keeping herself entertained and she usually prefers it that way; she is either in the mood to socialize or she'd rather do her own thing. Well that day she was extra crazy and somehow managed to trip on the carpet and decided to face plant her top teeth onto our metal bed frame

Blood ensued. Crying commenced.

After everything settled down and the bleeding stopped, we didn't see any noticeable damage and the Baby was acting like her normal self. Except the fact that she wasn't really eating. She has always used her top teeth to her advantage, tearing and gnawing everything we give her, but now she was obviously favoring her front teeth.

We ended up going to the doctor and the doctor just shrugged her off. She said she didn't see any traumatic damage and because the mouth is so vascular, there will be bleeding.

After a few days, the Baby still wasn't eating like normal and she was in obvious discomfort, so we went back to the doctor. He agreed with the original doctor visit and just said she's going to be sore.

So we monitored the Baby and she was getting better, she was eating more and not favoring her teeth and definitely not as fussy. Well yesterday at the Grandmother's house, she decided she wanted to fall again.

Once again, blood ensued. Crying commenced.

The Baby just fell without any prompting, so hopefully she doesn't have something messing up her equilibrium or we might need to go back to the doctor.

And now the Baby has jacked up her teeth. Like really messed up top teeth. You know in cartoons when a piano falls on a villains head and their teeth are hanging out their mouth like busted piano keys? The Baby = busted piano teeth.

The Wifey took her to a pediatric dentist and after a couple of x-rays, the Baby may have a hairline fracture in her mouth and jacked up teeth.

Since baby teeth aren't permanent, there isn't much that can be done, except limit solids and feed her jarred baby food. The Baby hates jarred food. Maybe it's a taste thing or maybe it's a texture thing but she hates it. She has gotten so used to eating table food, chewing up chicken, eating beans, that when we gave her a spoonful of mush, she literally got infuriated.

Luckily we only need to try and feed her baby food for only a few days and then slowly work in solids but the Baby isn't happy when she isn't eating.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Skull and Bones

I have always envied motorcycle riders as they cruise down the open road. It's like they have their own secret fraternity like the Skull and Bones as they pass each other on the asphalt. A simple head nod or a slight flick of the hand to acknowledge any other rider they pass on the road. Each bike rider gets their own sign of respect just because they'd rather ride on two wheels instead of four. It's cool to witness as they slightly rev their engines with their American flag bandannas flowing in the wind.

I tried to do that with my Nissan Altima. Spotting another driver who shared the same whip as myself, I respectfully gave them a head nod and a salute but in return I received a look of confusion or an un-neighborly one finger salute. I guess drivers of mid-sized sedans don't find it necessary to have their own fraternal order.

Is it too much to ask to want to belong in something?

But then I realized when I was with the Baby, either pushing her in her stroller, or carrying her in my arms, I noticed other people noticing me. Granted, I am a handsome chap, but I was being watched by other guys at the mall. Then it hit me. Guys with their kids get the same treatment as biker gangs. It's a tough job to keep your toddler in order; we sacrifice our days of watching sports and Steven Seagal movies to watch the kids so our wives can shop. It's not glamorous and definitely not as exciting as a Harley but I don't mind being apart of the fatherhood fraternity. Maybe a cool name like Skull and Diapers will suffice.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Disregard Everything

Disregard the messy bathroom, the big belly, and the over the top cheesy smile, this is a cute picture.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Kid's Room

This past Mother's Day we took the Wifey's mom out to Cibus at NorthPark Center in Dallas. The Wifey and I have been before for dinner and it was nice. We sat outside and had dinner in the courtyard so we figured it would be a good place to try for a Mother's Day brunch.

We arrived about ten minutes ahead of our reservation and were met by a really bitchy hostess. It was a madhouse so we figured she was just a little overwhelmed but we didn't even get a "have a nice day" acknowledgment on our way out. But anyways, as we were waiting we noticed that the room was filling up with families. Little kids dressed in their Sunday best seemed to be taking over the waiting room.

Cibus is set up so that there is a "private" dining room and the rest of the dining area is on the other side of the restaurant. We were sat in the private dining room and we thought it was special because we actually made reservations. Then we realized they had segregated all the families with children into this one dining area. Cibus will say it was by chance but there was no denying it. Forks banging on plates, kids screaming, little boys launching silverware across the room. And then we see a nice older couple and their son getting sat in the makeshift kids room. But they were not amused by the amount of kids in this room and it didn't help that Cibus had run out of drinking glasses so they served them in Styrofoam cups with a lid just like the other kids in the room.

But besides that, brunch at Cibus wasn't too bad. Just make sure you don't get stuck in the kids room.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Mother's Day Fail

I think I will always be that husband/father who just annually sucks at Mother's Day. Last year, under the guidance by own wife, I was told "don't worry about getting anything for me for Mother's Day." Being the dumb husband I am, I listened to her and took what she said literally. So I didn't get her anything. But she didn't mean she didn't want anything done for her. One of the main things she cherishes is my writing and last year I even neglected her the satisfaction of a Mother's Day blog post on her newly acquired day.

This year was no different. I just forgot to do stuff. Mid-week her best friend randomly texted me asking what I was doing for her, which usually meant that the Wifey knew I hadn't planned anything and was already bitching to her friend. I had plenty of ideas of things I wanted to do. But in order to do stuff, time and money are needed.

Great idea #1: I was going to take the Baby and myself to find one of those animated photo flip-book places and make a really cool photo flip-book for her. But those places only appear at birthday parties, weddings, and corporate events. I knew of no-one that was having a birthday party or wedding midweek.

Great idea #2: I thought about making her a mixed tape, like I used to do for her when we started dating, back in the early 2000s. But then I remembered the Baby has a new obsession with taking my blank cds and dragging them across the kitchen floor, scratching up their delicate surface.

Great idea #3: I planned on buying her another wedding band because she lost hers. But the ring shop I went to did not have her size on file. And I didn't want to get a ring that was too small otherwise she would take it that I thought her fingers were the size of Earl Campbell's Hot Links. I also couldn't get her a ring that was too small otherwise she would think I was remembering the skinnier days.

Great idea #4: I was going to buy her and her friend tickets to the Britney Spears concert but they beat me to it.

So my four great ideas didn't come to fruition. And my backup plan of getting her a cd or a book failed when she found her cd cheaper at Target and I forgot to get a card to go with her gifts. I also planned on writing this blog last night and having it automatically post this morning but I decided to get drunk on five bottles of Tecate and watch Hot Tub Time Machine instead. I even thought about surprising her and waking up immediately when the Baby did so she could sleep in - but my stupid 5 beer maximum prevented that as well.

So here's to my Wifey who married a husband that can't get Mother's Day right. Let's hope your daughter is more thoughtful than I.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Scrapbook App for the BlackBerry PlayBook

So I have a slight bias to the BlackBerry PlayBook and when TAT teased everyone with a scrapbook application, I knew it would be fun.

Let's not forget that I am a man who loves sports and fried foods but this is a pretty fun scrapbook application.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

The Babysitter's Club

Does it even exist? Did it ever exist? If so, I want their number. I think this day in age it's hard to find a trusted babysitter that I could leave my child with an enjoy a night out with the Wifey. I know, how could I pass up a night of babysitting in exchange for a used copy of Call of Duty on Craigslist? We have been lucky to have the mother in law nearby to occasionally pull some overtime and let us enjoy a night out but it seems that the Wifey and I are slowly re-gaining that itch to go out to dinner and not have to worry about what's on the kids menu. It also would be nice to watch a movie that isn't animated.

This past weekend we tried to go to a wedding, it's been in the plans for awhile. We thought getting someone to watch the Baby would be a cinch; she's adorably cute and fun to watch but she also likes to sleep and stay asleep. It's not hard to sit in a house and listen to a baby not cry. But apparently the help we sought decided at the last second that it was a particular task that was far too daunting for any average 27 year old. I just don't see how the 14 year old girls in the Babysitter's Club were able to do it.

So now we're on a search for a reliable, trustworthy babysitter to be in the house while a baby sleeps. We don't care if your boyfriend comes over after his shift at Whataburger and smells of burgers and fries, just so y'all can neck and sext and whatever teenagers do nowadays. I just ask that you don't smoke in the house, don't drink, and your boyfriend brings home some leftovers. Although we adore the mother in law for willing to watch the Baby, she needs to get out as well.

So, if the Babysitter's Club really exists, we're hiring.

Raising a Tomboy

I would have no problem raising a tomboy. I sometimes find myself daydreaming the Baby as the next Mia Hamm, blasting the ball into the upper 90, giving props to her amazing father who coached her from birth. I wouldn't mind not having to worry if the Baby's skirt is too short or if she's wearing too much makeup or if she needs the latest designer handbag. Even the Wifey herself isn't into all of that stuff and on occasion will make herself as pretty as a penny, but usually just to compete with her friends.

That's why it's weird to see the Baby attempting to try on different outfits and putting on clothes. Or if anything has a strap, she will slide her arm through it and sling it over her shoulder. She even has a little handbag that her grandmother gave her that she likes to tote around.

I know she is really young but she has already shown a lot of dainty qualities. She will walk around the house with a basket or a bag over her shoulder and collect things as she loads up her bag. It's super cute now but I fear it might be an issue when she's in high school. But I guess it won't be too bad, unless she gets fashion advice from her mom.