Wednesday, March 6, 2013


Today would make eight years since my mom passed away and as much as I want to say it feels like it was only yesterday, I can't. Eight years is a long time. If the Baby were born then, she'd be almost done with 2nd grade. Eight years is to the point that I can barely remember the sound of my mom's voice; yelling at me for doing something wrong. Sometimes I get lucky and have a dream where I can pinpoint her vivid laugh in a crowded room but those dreams are getting more and more rare each time I fall asleep. Seems that inception doesn't always work; so I am forced to watch 'shit Asian moms say' even though it reminds me more of my dad than anything.

But I don't have any worries that the Baby would experience the same issue when I die. Technology is so prolific now that documenting your life is second nature. We have a few pictures of my mom but rarely any that depict her personality. It's always a nice, photogenic smile for the camera but the real memory is the dirty look she'd give afterwards because she had to pose for another picture.

Sometimes I worry that the Baby is 'overexposed' since my Instagram and Facebook uploads are all about her. My friends tell me it's fine because she's cute so it's okay. I feel sorry for the parents of ugly kids. Those pictures are annoying. So freaking annoying. But we have a lot of pictures and videos of the Baby doing random things but not that many of me . I really don't care to be in any videos or pictures and I have a weird voice but I know it would mean a lot to have that memory documented.

We will end up doing the same thing for my mom's birthday like we do every year: get some yummy food and then take the Baby to stare at a patch of grass in the cemetery. Maybe I'll Instagram it.

Monday, March 4, 2013

A Beautiful Little Fool

The Baby is finally coming around to appreciating what is going on in the movies and shows she watches. She knows when the hero wins the girl or the villain does something dastardly. I have seen her display a wide range of emotions just from from watching The Lion King. She has even found extreme delight in slapstick comedy - and she will just let out bellyful giggles when a character gets the random smack in the head.We were enjoying a lazy Thursday night watching Ice Age; the Baby and I were sharing the loveseat and crunching on chips when the Baby discovered a scene she truly enjoyed:


Now my question is when do we realize that our kids are going to be geniuses or if they are just going to be average? Parents freak out when their kids do something new and it's always, "I think that's early for their age!" or "They are ahead of schedule if they are doing that already!" But I guess I am aware that kids develop sooner than others but that doesn't make the ones that take their sweet time doing things on command any less intelligent.

Some kids are going to recite the alphabet, others can write their name; my child counts the numbers of turds she leaves in the toilet.

The Baby is approaching her third birthday and I couldn't tell you if she is advanced or behind. She knows her numbers but for some reason can only count in order to 4 or maybe she doesn't want to count to 5. The Baby knows her letters but for some odd reason wants to combine the alphabet song with 'itsy bitsy spider.' 

But I'm not worried. She has always been one to do things on her own terms; sometimes I wish she'd do them sooner than later.
"I hope she’ll be a fool—that’s the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool." - The Great Gatsby