Mall Playgrounds

My Facebook is getting bombarded with all my friends who are having their babies. Well, at least my Facebook was getting bombarded until Jesse Eisenberg decided to change up the layout. But congratulations to everyone as they get to enjoy a calm, easy baby. Sleep, feed, and change for the first few weeks. Enjoy it.

So I have been taking my daughter to the local mall to play in their indoor playground. Good padding, things to climb, and other kids to give the stink-eye. And let me just say, if you are easily prone to heart attacks, mall playgrounds are not for you.

There are kids jumping off crap, screaming, and blindly running with their fists flailing while their parents sit in the corner and gulp down their Frappucino. I don't see how these kids, who are probably scared of the vacuum, can just eject themselves off these play structures with no fear. The Baby decided she just wanted to walk off the side of a four foot bridge without realizing she was going to fall. These kids are literally diving off shit and bouncing off their heads, their legs are all twisted and they pop up and do it again.

There has to be some kind of crazy chemical on those things because it's chaos.

And the Baby absolutely loves it. We spent an hour there today and she was passed out by the time we got back to the car.

Luckily I go in the morning during the week so the real crazy kids aren't there. But you do run into the judgmental stay at home mom who wonders why your daughter has dried yogurt on her face and is wearing an unbuttoned onesie with pants.  Bitch.